Let's be real...you two have so many choices to make before you even tie the knot: large wedding vs intimate, musician vs DJ, fresh florals or dried, invite your annoying aunt or let her stay home; the decisions to make are never-ending.
Regardless of where you and your boo currently fall in the planning process, one thing we can all agree on is checking off great wedding etiquette and a smooth wedding planning experience that we won't regret. I really do believe that this list will benefit your decision-making process, so let's dive right into the top 10 greatest do's and don'ts for your wedding day!
1. DON'T HIRE A FRIEND (OR YOURSELF) BECAUSE IT'S CHEAPER
I know Uncle Jerry has been taking his own landscape portraits for years, and nobody slays a full face of makeup with lashes like you. However, please take as much time you need to afford your dream vendors; this is something your future self will thank you for.
Here are only a few things, of many, that could go wrong when a non-professional takes over the job of a wedding vendor:
- No backup plan for missing or broken tools, weather, or mishaps due to lack of equipment/experience.
- Disorganization because of little to no knowledge on the natural flow of a working wedding day.
- Low quality result, leaving you with an inaudible ceremony, blurry images, leaning cake, or uneven makeup.
- Insufficient time to complete your 32 wedding DIY's, so now only 4/32 things are ready on time.
- A noticeable increase of stress and anxiety, reflecting in all of your images.
If you must hire a non-professional friend, make sure you have seen their work and love it, or ask the right questions to make sure they are at least prepared for what is to come so that your day runs as smoothly as possible! If you must DIY things for your day, make sure you time everything correctly and over-prepare with many hands on deck.
2. DO SET BOUNDARIES WITH YOUR PARENTS
You are the one that is going to remember that everyone who was invited to your wedding, actually cared about your union. You are the one who will live with over 1000 images, and endless memories + conversation of the location of your venue, the color scheme of your wedding party, or even the PERSON you are married to!
There is a way to respectfully set a boundary, and however you see fit to do it, just make sure it is done with lots of love and grace.
3. DON'T LEAVE YOUR FIANCE(E) OUT
Find the balance in wedding planning/dating and avoid drowning your partner in your vision. ✨ Sprinkle both of your personalities for your day and allow a blend of your two styles and tastes to create a day you will both be proud of.
4. DO EAT THE FOOD YOU PAID FOR
It isn't as common as you may think! Guests are super anxious to speak to you and your spouse, which is great and all, until 120 people are approaching your table back-to-back for the entire dinner portion of your reception. If you can have a private room, just for dinner time, thats perfect! If not, try to have the DJ announce that you will make your rounds to greet each table after dinner is served.
5. DON'T WAIT UNTIL LAST MINUTE TO BOOK YOUR VENDORS
Photographers and Venues are typically the first to get booked out 12 months in advance. You risk not booking your dream vendor on your dream date when you wait until the last few months to secure them with a deposit.
6. DO GET TO KNOW YOUR OFFICIANT
It is pretty easy to find someone to marry you online, these days. Remember that the officiant is who is facilitating an extremely emotional moment, and will be hard to forget when you relive your ceremony every time you flip through the wedding album.
If you are a Christian, or associate with a religion of any sort, make sure you hire someone whose theology aligns with yours to properly communicate the point of the union.
If you aren't a Christian, or religious, prioritize finding an officiant who is intentional about expressing the heart behind your union, in a personalized way.
7. DON'T FORGET TO DANCE WITH YOUR HUSBAND/WIFE
Remember, it's called a FIRST dance, not the only dance! These moments go by way too fast, we don't even notice that we only really danced with our spouse during the first dance and then we realize that there are rarely any photos of us having a good time together for the rest of the night. Twerkkkk on your hubby or wifey...it's more than okay now 😜
8. DO HAVE AN UNPLUGGED CEREMONY
Not only does this assure your guests will be present to witness the union, it also looks TERRIBLE on camera when the photos of you walking up the aisle are filled with iPads, iPhones, tablets, DSLR's, etc.
Have a sign up at the entrance of your ceremony asking to keep devices away, and since people pretend to ignore it, ask your officiant to make an announcement before the processional.
Seriously...what does your long lost cousin who isn't even on social media, actually do with the 41 photos of you walking down the aisle?... Weird.
9. DON'T GET TRASHED (AT LEAST, BEFORE THE RECEPTION)
By all means, this wedding day is yours, and you are free to spend it as you see fit!
These are just the two cents you can take with a grain of salt based off of my experiences. With the amount of hours you have worked in preparation of your wedding day, to not remember how it all went, is something 97% of my couples regret. Trust me...ya girl knows how to party. But let's party at the actual party with the love of your life, and not stumbling, seconds before you make one of the biggest commitments. This doesn't only affect how you feel post-wedding, but what your partner must feel in real time, knowing their husband/wife had to get wasted to go through with marrying them🤭
10. DO RELAX ...DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF
Last but not least, DO relax. I tell all of my couples "Let's plan, but remember that plans change." Accept the changes that will naturally happen on your wedding day, and remember that everything will happen exactly as it should. All of the imperfections of your day, will make your day as unique as its meant to be and will probably give you a fun story for years to come. Soak it in, it goes by so fast.